Forgiveness is not about making the other person feel better about themselves or taking the blame for their actions.
True forgiveness is about leading the other person to Christ. And sometimes, leaving them there.
Forgiveness begins as willingness, but the relationship cannot be restored until there is also repentance.
Forgiveness is a willingness extended. Sometimes we must hold that position for a long, long time. A lifetime of a willingness extended.
When we jump over forgiveness directly to restoration, we have not done the other person any good and in fact may cause harm. We may have become an enabler. In the worst case scenario, we may have come between them and God.
True forgiveness leads to restoration; it does not equal restoration. Restoration is about new boundaries, reparation, and building. Restoration takes time.
Sometimes forgiveness is about knowing when to walk away, when to let go.
God can forgive without being emotionally damaged. We cannot forgive without being emotionally damaged without God.
God can forgive without having to establish what that forgiveness means.
When God forgives. . .
1.) He can pay the debt owed.
2.) He can never be cuckolded or fooled.
3.) He can never be emotionally damaged.
We need to stop trying to forgive as if we were God, and simply forgive because He forgave us.
We make it too complicated.