All behavior is linked to attitudes of the heart.
Therefore, discipline must address attitudes of the heart.
Your concern is to unmask your child's sin, helping him to understand how it reflects a heart that has strayed.
That leads to the cross of Christ.
It underscores the need for a Savior.
It provides opportunities to show the glories of God who sent His son to change hearts and free people enslaved to sin.
You must learn to engage them, not reprove them.
This proposition will inform everything you do as parents.
It will dictate your goals.
It will inform your methods.
~ Tedd Tripp, Shepherding a Child's Heart
*reprove - to find fault with
*engage - to capture the interest, stimulate thought and introspection